Welcome Kendal Donna!

On April 11, 2013 at 2:27 p.m., my husband and I welcomed our second beautiful daughter into the world.  Meet Kendal Donna.


I told Dan about two months ago that I had a feeling this baby would make a different entrance into the world.  Actually what I believe I said was, “She’s just not going to cooperate…”  And as a mother’s intuition serves, I was right.  Kendal progressed quickly before I had her, but she would not commit to labor.  The day I went into the hospital, I was dilated to a five with over a week’s worth of false labor.  My doctor suggested we just break my water to give her a little kick start.  After active labor had began, we learned that Kendal was positioned in a deep transverse arrest.  This means that instead of the top of her head presenting for birth, the front of her face was with her neck bent back.  Having her in this position prevented labor from starting on it’s own, and in the end made delivery unsafe and not possible.  From there we headed down to OR where she was delivered safely via cesarean section.

Feeling terrified in the operating room with bright lights, numerous people moving quickly and a blue sheet over my lower half, there was Dan reassuring me that everything would be fine.  Moments later I heard her first cry–scream actually!  I melted in tears.  Suddenly all of the fears I had leading up to this delivery left me.  She was here.  I knew she was just fine.

It was only a short while longer until I would hold my girl.  The recovery nurses knew how badly I wanted to be upstairs with her so they let me sneak up just a little early.  They wheeled me into my room and there on the couch was one proud daddy snuggling his newest little.  I could tell by the way his smiling eyes were glued to her just how in love he was.  But it was my turn to get my arms around her.  I stared at her and examined her the way I knew I would–the only way I know.  She was 7 pounds, 6 ounces and 21 inches long!  Her sweet little head was covered in fuzzy black hair.  Her long fingers and toes were conversation pieces when we would unwrap her for each visitor to see.  This time I waited to call or text people.  I wanted her to myself–to enjoy with Dan.  I was in love; deeply in love.

She was nameless for a long while.  I struggled with names this time around, because once again I needed to see her.  Nothing felt perfect prior to her arrival.  I wanted it to fit her the way Tessa fit.

mom-kendal 1

“Kendal” had been on and off of our name list for months and we didn’t pull it back out until after she was here.  I knew I wanted her middle name to be Donna; after my late Grandma whom I deeply adored.  Once I said “Kendal Donna” a few times, I knew it fit her beautifully.

I forgot just how quickly babies transition from newborn to infant to toddler.  Having Kendal showed me just how much Tessa has changed in what feels like such a short time.  But there is something about the innocence and beauty of a brand new baby that captivates me in the sweetest splendor.  The way they smell, the way they wrap their tiny fingers around yours, the snuggles, the needy cries, the hungry rooting and newborn yawns all take me away to a blissful paradise.

kendal 3 days

I was blessed once with a sweet and charming little darling.  How did I get so lucky to have it happen twice?


Since being home from the hospital, I have had overwhelming feelings of nostalgia especially when I dress Kendal is some of Tessa’s baby clothes or swaddle her in Tessa’s blankets.  I am reminded of a once painful homecoming (that is far less painful these days) and of the once new baby girl that is now a big sister.  I am reminded of my blessings.  Kendal molds in perfectly.  Everything just feels right.

Welcome to the world Kendal Donna Carey.  May you always feel the love that surrounds you.


To my girlfriends and mamas in waiting…

As I draw near the end of my pregnancy, I find myself thinking a lot about my dear girlfriends.  Some are expecting, some are trying, some may not ever have children, but right now to me they are all mamas in waiting.  And all I can think to do is tell them a few things that are likely headed their way in the weeks, months, and years to come.

Congratulations ladies!  You’re prepping to become a mom–a title that will take some time to get used to, especially when you say things like, “Do you want mommy?”, or “Mommy’s tired!”, or when you are called “Mama” for the first time.  Which leads me to jump the track for a second…if you are reading this and thinking “momma or mama?”  Who cares.  Seriously.

Where was I?  Oh yes, I was about the get sentimental.  I lost that now.  While having a baby is truly a blessing, I want you to know that there will come a time where you will be staring at that baby months after they are born, and it will be in the middle of the night after a scream-a-thon and it will hit you.  Everything you knew about your life prior to this baby will seem to have disappeared.  It may or may not return down the road, but there will be a time when it’s gone.  If someone tells you differently, I promise you they are lying.  Trust me.

You will soon trade sixty minutes for getting ready for twenty, and you will be a pro at it.  You’ll trade cute and snug comfy clothes at home for sweat pants and 99% cotton t-shirts…that’s right, your old high school basketball t-shirt or your partner’s XL pit-stained shirts and you won’t care.  You’ll trade long nights out downtown for some long nights crib-side, and when your nights out happen, you will recover slowly and more painfully than you have ever remembered.  Here are a few others:

  1. Lunch dates for afternoon naps 
  2. An empty tub/shower for a tub full of baby shampoo and water spraying animals
  3. Grey’s Anatomy for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse
  4. Laundry day for laundry week
  5. An hour of privacy for a trip alone to the bathroom
  6. Cute designer handbag for an over-sized diaper bag full of every essential your baby will need for an end-of-the-world apocalypse, plus your wallet, sunglasses, tampons, cell phone and tylenol…and you will rock it like it’s a Coach.

You will find yourself leaving your little one to play alone because you will be too tired.  It happens.  What you do with that time is your choice, but you will get creative.  Your living room will be taken over by more toys than decorative Pier 1 pieces.  You’ll buy more AA, AAA, D and C batteries than you ever anticipated because every freaking toy around requires four of every different kind.  There will be times when you think you still “got it”  and sadly you’ll secretly question “I’m still pretty cool, I think?”  Like when you are alone in your car driving to the grocery store like it’s a vacation and you are rocking out to 90’s on 9 on XM.  Impressed that you still remember the lyrics to that Dr. Dre song, at the same time you’ll want to call him out for being inappropriate.  Sigh.

But I also promise that it will be okay.  Just put down that parenting book that has taken you five months to get half way through because in the end, you will use next to none of it.  You will rely on your own instincts and phone calls to your mother.  You’ll call your doctor way too many times.  You’ll overreact, but you will certainly adapt.   And yet these changes won’t end you.  You’ll laugh at it all because when you really think about how much you have changed, it will be funny.

So hang in there love.  Don’t take yourself so seriously.  And remember when you need or even get a wine break and you have no clean glasses:  Anything that is concave is capable of holding that Pinot!